Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Limited Time Offer

**Another old one, this time from senior year of high school:


I saw you walking down the street,
Your dress pressed nicely, hair so neat,
The air around you ever sweet,
And I knew then that you'd be mine.

I couldn't help but stare in awe - 
I dropped my briefcase, dropped my jaw.
You seemed to not have any flaw - 
No other woman was as fine.

I hesitated, didn't talk,
Instead I hid and tried to stalk
Until I saw you calmly walk
Into Chez Elle - 'twas time to dine.

Now as the clock hit ten to eight,
I couldn't hold it, couldn't wait.
I walked to your half-empty plate
And your near-empty glass of wine. 

And there I was, for you to see - 
Our meeting there was destiny.
And though you stood reluctantly, 
I begged to talk before I'd resign.

So with a slight nod you approved,
And I, ecstatic, then removed
A Scrub-Blast™ cleaner (much improved)
For only nineteen ninety-nine!

Then suddenly you shouted, "No!"
But I just couldn't let you go.
I grabbed your hand, I had to show
This new invention, so divine. 

But you stormed out, I guess you hated
Salesmen, though we're underrated.
My anguish still has not abated!
Am I perceived as just a swine?

My cleaner to you I'd impart,
But, alas, right from the start
You led me on, then broke my heart
Through your rejection and decline.

Which client were you? I can't tell,
Although one-eighty rings a bell.
It sure is awful hard to sell
These worthless products made of pine.

And what's my wish, just once a year?
A client saying, without fear,
Those seven words I'd love to hear:
"I'd like that item to be mine." 

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